Oh Danny Boys

The top fifteen Dannys - Alive or Dead, real or fictional


Honorable Mention: Danny! aka D. Swain I haven't really heard of him before but Danny! has too great of a stage name to leave off this list altogether. He's apparently a southern hip-hop producer and mixer who has been nominated for several Grammys(!).

15. Danny Bonaduce-I learned who he was on "The Other Half," which was a daytime TV show he hosted with Dick Clark that aired six or seven years ago much like "The View" for men. My mom explained to me Danny was famous because he was a member of the Partridge family when he was a little boy. Slowly I learned just how screwed up this guy was from observing his quotes in the media and through stuff like his VH1 show "Breaking Bonaduce." This rude man barely deserves to bear his first name but his somehow enduring fame is enough to sneak him on this list. Even if it's not the best press, he gets the name Danny into the spotlight.

14. Danny White-Even if he was a choker, never winning a playoff game I don't believe despite having great teams, if you take over the Dallas Cowboys starting quarterback position from Roger Staubach and keep it for seven years, you have to be doing something right.


13. Danny Saucedo-A top six finalist in Swedish Idol, this blonde Scandinavian pretty-boy looks to be Europe's answer to Lou Bega. Check it: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VG2-Z3BkXDw

12. Danny Tanner-Host of "Wake-up San Franscisco", America's favorite single home-maker, and the man who could be held responsible for the train wreck that is the Olsen twins. How did Bob Saget manage to contain himself?

11. Danny Gladden-One of the heroes of the Twins World Series teams, I first learned who Gladden was after purchasing a stock of roughly 300 baseball cards for about six bucks at an antique sale when I was seven. I found his card amongst the pile and, assuming my dad knew everything, asked him as soon as he got home whether Dan Gladden was still playing, because with a name like his he was already one of my new favorite players. My dad immediately responded no, he had retired. Astonished that he would know such a mundane piece of trivia, my mom asked him how he knew such a thing off the top of his head. Easy, he'd heard it announced on the radio on the way home from work that day. Now Danny's doing Herb Carneal proud, commentating Twins games on the radio with flare.

10. Danny DeVito-The first actor I ever heard of with my first name, DeVito was introduced to me as the evil alien in Space Jam, then next as Phil in Hercules. He defies pretty much every Hollywood convention as a homely, pot-bellied, legal dwarf at 4'10''. He's played everything from Arnold Schwarzenegger's twin to the villainous Penguin in Batman (which I still want to see). He's even been nominated for an Oscar and won an Emmy during his rise to fame with Andy Kaufman in the TV show Taxi.

9. Danny Manning-I thought about putting Celtics GM and former great Danny Ainge here instead, but after he stole Garnett I just couldn't do it. So, instead the NBA will be here represented in the form of the classy power-forward Manning, who was actually coached by Ainge at one point. Manning was a two-time all-star and one-time sixth man of the year and won a bronze medal in the '88 Olympics.

8. Danny Boyle-I kinda loved 28 Days Later, I kinda hated 28 Weeks later, but I've heard Trainspotting is phenomenal and Sunshine's supposedly not half bad either. He also directed Millions, which was quite a pleasant surprise of a movie to me. Besides, he's got a great rapport with Cillian Murphy, who's almost always awesome, Nuff said.

7. Yours Truly-Come on, I'm like a résumé for awesomeness.

6. Danny Deckchair-A hilariously quirky Aussie rom-com about a guy named Danny who flies to a new life after tying some balloons to his lawn-chair. Rhys Ifans should consider changing his first name permanently.

5. Danny Elfman-He's one of Hollywood's greatest composers. It's my theory that 50% of all movie scores are either written by him or John Williams, with maybe a little Ennio Morricone thrown in. He's provided the music for such movies as Mission Impossible, Men in Black, and Good Will Hunting, as well as essentially every Tim Burton movie ever, getting an Oscar nom for Big Fish, as well as Good Will Hunting and MIB. He even provides the singing voice of Jack Skellington in The Nightmare Before Christmas and created the theme songs for The Simpsons and Desperate Housewives, for which he won an Emmy. He won a Grammy for Batman.

4. Danny Butterman-The affable sidekick Police Constable of the village of Sandford, Danny Butterman is played pitch-perfect by Nick Frost. What would Hot Fuzz be without the ignorant, pure-hearted, good humored, and thrill-seeking Danny?

3. Danny Glover-Glover brings unrivaled grace and poise to the ranks. Who wasn't brought to tears by his heart-rending performance as the manager in Angels in the Outfield? Besides that, he's been nominated for an Oscar for The Color Purple along side Oprah and Whoopi, he's torn it as a no-nonsense cop with Mel Gibson in the Lethal Weapon movies, and he gets owned in the first and best Saw, not to mention a friend of mine's dad sat next to him on a plane and said he was a really down-to-earth friendly guy. (Update 9/14/2009: So, I just watched The Color Purple for the first time, and apparently he wasn't actually nominated for an Oscar for the Color Purple, though he was quite good in it. He has been nominated for 4 prime time Emmys for assorted roles over the years though)

2. Danny Ocean-He's just too cool for school. Clooney brings his trademark class to the endlessly suave and handsome swindler of the new Oceans movies in the lead role. He's the epitome of style. Julia Roberts isn't my first choice but hey, to each his own.

1. Danny Champion of the World-I think he pretty much wins by default. The main character of the book of the same name by Roald Dahl, Danny saves his father by tricking the evil rich guy and stealing all his prize pheasants in Dahl's classic work. To boot, the kid could fix cars when he was five years old, now that's impressive.